Fin and I recently watched House of Cards in an attempt to fill the West-Wing-shaped void in our lives. I spent a great deal of time admiring Claire Underwood's hair.

We also recently watched The Queen: A Passion for Horses. I don't know why, I don't even like horses, but we'd finished House of Cards and there was nothing else on. I spent a great deal of time admiring Clare Balding's professionalism, warmth and ability to make even the dullest subject seem fascinating (an HOUR-LONG documentary about the special royal-equine bond? Really, BBC?). I spent precisely no time admiring Clare's hair. Sorry, Clare.

What nobody warns you about pixie crops is that you can leave your house thinking you're at the Underwood end of the Claire Hair Spectrum, but one brisk walk to work later and you find yourself dangerously close to Balding territory. It's a fine, fine line my friends.

And that is the last time I will fret about my hair.

This month, anyway.


Images: Underwood / Balding

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I cut my hair off. Who am I to argue with the popular vote? But part of me wishes I'd waited until it was actually, as opposed to nominally, spring. Specifically, my ears and the back of my neck are less than thrilled. Brr.

Speaking of the popular vote, we're agonisingly close to finishing the final season of the West Wing and I know we're supposed to care who wins the election but OMG WHO CARES ABOUT THAT WITH ALL OF THE ROMANTIC TENSION OMG OMG. How the hell did people cope, watching this unfold over weeks? I am beside myself with excitement. If you haven't seen it, what are you waiting for? And if you have seen it YOU KNOW WHO I'M TALKING ABOUT. (Sorry, the West Wing has a tendency to bring out my all caps.) There's a faint whiff of Grey's Anatomy lingering in the White House corridors these days, with all of the snogging. There doesn't seem to be much governing going on here, people.

I doubt that sort of thing goes on over at the Scottish Parliament. At least, I hope it doesn't. Let's just say there aren't many Holyrood couplings I'd be quite so happy to watch on screen. The mind boggles.

For those of you who might not be fully up to speed with your Scottish politics, we have a referundum coming up next year to determine whether Scotland should remain part of the United Kingdom or become a fully independent country. Facts and figures are being hurled at us from all sides already, but neither camp has yet addressed my primary concern: what about Eurovision? I don't know if I'm ready to face a future where Scotland's finest musical talent has to slug it out in the semi-finals against the demented warblings of some former plumber from Azerbaijan. It's time for the campaigns to stop fretting about taxes and national identity and start getting into the serious issues.

Just as long as they don't start snogging.


P.S. On a completely unrelated note, I added some new pictures to the portfolio. Thanks, Lauren!

Image: Frank Egel Photography. Just to be clear, that's not me. In case there was any confusion. Ahem.

Image: via Pinterest, original source untraceable. Why are all the hair ones so damn hard to find? Pie chart made at piecolor.com.

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Just kidding. It's about my hair. Again.

I decided to grow the pixie crop out for Blonde Bridesmaid's wedding, because we were wearing long, floaty, purple gowns and I didn't want my head to look like a peanut perched on top of an aubergine. Understandable. So I grew it longer, into a short bob, and since then it has grown even longer, into a straggly mess.

Now it's getting beyond ridiculous. It badly needs cut. But the trouble is, I'm torn about which way to go. Pixie or bob? Bob or pixie? It's a DILEMMA. And I need your help.

PIXIE PROS:

♥ Zero maintenance on a daily basis, which means a few minutes shaved off my morning routine, which means I can get to work that little bit earlier. HA. Not really. Sleep, precious sleep, I want moooorre.

♥ I know it suits me. Nobody ever in my life complimented my cheekbones before I went for the crop. There's a reason the cut is called a pixie: it's a little bit magic.

♥ According to this wonderful piece on short hair by Joan Juliet Buck, "short hair removes obvious femininity and replaces it with style," which can be both daunting and exhilarating. I try to aim for the latter.

PIXIE CONS:

♥ High maintenance on a long-term basis. In other words, twelve weeks between cuts isn't going to fly, unless I want to rock the alpaca look.

♥ Increased risk of looking like a middle-aged woman. Or a man. Or a lesbian. Or a middle-aged male lesbian (Eddie Izzard, I'm looking at you).

♥ Also according to Joan Juliet Buck, "short hair requires you to keep your weight slightly below acceptable levels." Bear in mind she was the editor of French Vogue, so we can only imagine what her idea of an "acceptable level" is. Fear this could disrupt my current cheese-eating schedule.

BOB PROS:

♥ Change of scene. The trouble with a pixie is that, once it's on your head, it doesn't really *do* anything. It just sits there, being short. It gets a bit repetitive. I haven't had a full-on bob for nearly two years - time for a change?

♥ I swear a bob makes you look French. Especially the all-one-length, jaw-skimming ones I've had my eye on. That could be because all the pictures I've been pinning are of French women, but surely that just proves my point? And everybody knows looking French is a key consideration in all matters sartorial.

♥ Ponytails. I miss ponytails.

BOB CONS:

♥ My hair is pretty fine, so the longer it is, the flatter it looks. When I used to have proper long hair, it basically looked like I'd draped a hair-coloured tea towel over my head.

♥ What, you mean I actually have to style my hair? Like, with a brush? What do you think I am, some kind of hairdresser?

♥ Is a bob just the poor man's pixie? Is it for people who are too lazy to grow their hair and too scared to chop it all off? Would it be a cop-out? Am I over-thinking this? (Don't answer that last one.)

THIS IS WHERE YOU COME IN:

As you can probably tell from the above, I'm more torn than Natalie Imbruglia (who, interestingly, went for that messy pixie-bob hybrid. A third option? Wait, no, no more options!).

Bob or pixie?? Pixie or bob?? Please somebody just tell me what to do! Vote in the comments!!

Ha. Just kidding. That's not me. I'm blonder than that.

This is me, sporting my new do and, apparently, too much bronzer:



Here, for reference, is the Before:

For the eagle-eyed among you - yes, this is the aforementioned sequin leggings outfit

Here's a little side-by-side Before & After for you:



See? Crrrrazy.

1. Short hair rocks.

2. Meeting new people can actually be fun!

3. Me and Fin are MFEO.

4. I need to get a decent camera. And then learn how to use it.

5. I really need to hoover.

The Twigster. Via here.

Image by D Sharon Pruitt

Image by Bethan Phillips

Exhibit C: The Ponytail in action. (Not my usual nails, btw)